Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Randomize
