windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
