What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Randomize
