I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
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