I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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