Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
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