i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I understand Curling. That high.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
My vagina is officially offended.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
