absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
i want to fuck
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it's pretty self explanatory
people are starting to question the shark bite story
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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