with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
