Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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