Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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