There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Still dying that you shit outside
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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