When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize
