next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
