i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
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