I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
being pregnant is like rehab
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
