He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
