I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
