everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
just found out that she named her cat after me.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
