take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
All I want is dick and wine.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
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