he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
