hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
