I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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