oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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