yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize
