I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
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