She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
