road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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