I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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