So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Tell her she can't have a vagina
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
last night I used snow as a chaser
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
