please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Just took my morning after pill in the library
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
