i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
