rhymes with "ouble enetration"
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
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