somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Randomize
