with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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