She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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