im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Naked. naked and bneed help.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
