I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
