She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
