I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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