Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Randomize
