Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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