i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
