people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
You ate ashes out of my bong
Randomize
