he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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