STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
