nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
