you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
