so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
