Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize
