Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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